Ok, so my co-host and I were discussing this coming week’s big winners, and the usual suspects like Bama, Clemson or Ohio St. didn’t immediately roll off the tongue. No, it was Home Depot, the Masters, wives that hate football, and generally anyone who gets to play on this COVID-19 ravaged weekend that are this week’s official Week Zero Winners. Seriously, stay as safe as you can out there, and hopefully we can amuse you with the games we have left. Give our Podcast a listen!
This Week in the SEC… or What’s Left of It
Vandy @ Kentucky -18 | o/u 41.5 | Noon E | Jefferson Pilot | Lexington, Ky
Pettey: I don’t want to complain, but seriously!? We get three SEC games, and this is one of them. In fact, the entire slate is borderline garbage, unless your team is one of the lucky 6. Oh yeah, this is going to be a thriller. Vandy isn’t covering two weeks in a row, and Kentucky is much more competent than Maroon State. Week Zero Winner: Kats
Jamal Mashburn 42 – Vandy 3
Michael: C-A-T-S CATS CATS CATS!!!!!! Kentucky takes out some much-needed aggression… on the only SEC Team that they’re capable of seriously aggressing. After all, Vandy is basically a bye week for 12 of the other 13 SEC programs. Week Zero Winner: Blue Cats
SEC Scout Team 7 – Cats 35
Arkansas @ Florida -17 | o/u 60 | 7:00 E | ESPN | Jort Swamp
Pettey: Florida dismantled Georgia last week and took command of the East. Arkansas is the surprise of the league. Even though Pittman is out with COVID-19, I expect them to give the Gators a fight. I also expect a bit of an emotional letdown after last week’s big win in Jacksonville. I expect Arky to keep it just inside the number. Week Zero Winner: Gators
Gators 35 – Arky 21
Michael: It’s time for a classic Mullen flop. Arky is recycling a washed-up Tiger King Coach (if you don’t get this joke, LISTEN TO THE POD) now that Pittman has the COVID-19, so common sense says take the lizards. But I’m going with the red hot hogs… for the cover, not to win… I’m not stupid. Week Zero Winner: Backdoor Dan… and Las Vegas
Disappointments 35 – Hawgs 21
Cocks @ Rebearsharks™ -11 | o/u 70.5 | 7:30 E | SECN | God’s Country Grove
Pettey: At Ole Miss, “we Red-Shirt Miss Americas.” This adage reined true again this week as the beautiful Miss Asya Branch took home the honors for Miss U.S.A. As for the game, Ole Miss is better. I think they will win. You have lost your damn mind if you think the Rebel defense can keep it within 11 against anyone. Week Zero Winner: Rebs
Rebearsharks™ 52 – Cocks 42
Michael: Please, let this game not suck. It’s probably our only hope for a good one outside of the pig-lizard match. I’m hoping for offensive fireworks on both sides, maybe even a multi-overtime affair 🤞! Week Zero Winner: Rebels
Cocks 44 – Powder Blue 46
Other Notable Games
Miami @ Va Tech -2.5 |o/u 68 | Noon E | ESPN | Lynchburg? Blacksburg? Freezeburg (low blow)?
Pettey: The Hokies lost at home last week to Liberty. Now they are favored at home over #9 Miami. This is what I like to call “BAIT”. Vegas really, really wants you to take Miami. This is where you grow gambling balls and say hell no Vegas. Week Zero Winner: Hokies
Va Tech 49 – Miami 45
Michael: After last week’s stunner, the wheels must have fallen off the wagon over at Va. Tech, right?! As our man on Gameday might say, NOT SO FAST! I also believe this to be a case of ‘recency bias’. Thanksgiving comes a couple weeks early in Blacksburg and the Turkey’s get the W. Week Zero Winner: Va. Tech Turkeys
Gobblers 31 – The Artist Formerly Known as “The U” 27
2 Notre Dame @ Boston College +11.5 | o/u 50 | 7:30 E | NBC | Boston Somewhere
Pettey: I’ll say it again, “BAIT”. My theory on this game mirrors my thoughts on the Va Tech game. However, this seems like more of the ‘letdown’ variety. No way this line should be that low. Week Zero Winner: Domers (close)
Domers 28 – BC 21
Michael: The last time I expected a let down from the Golden Domers after an impressive performance, albeit a loss, in Athens (circa 2019), they taught me a lesson. Unlike a QB, a gambler must have a very long memory. Fool me once… Week Zero Winner: Touchdown Jesus
ND 27 – Baked Beans 9
13 Whiskey @ Michigan +4.5 o/u 53.5, 7:30 E, ABC, Ann Harbor
Pettey: I just picked this game to pick against that idiot Harbaugh. He sucks and Whiskey will roll. I would enjoy but I will be watching the Rebs Week Zero Winner: Whiskey
Whiskey 28 – Meechegin 13
Michael: Harbaugh… Haha hahahaha hahahahahahahaha. Wisky finally gets to play some football, so my bet is they are champing at the bit to hit someone. And let’s be real, if you were a Michigan player, would you be excited about that ‘classic’ offense? Me either. Week Zero Winner: Cheese Curds of Wisconsin
